.Beautiful Disaster.

Thinking about the future mostly,
about what to pursue once I graduate,
what i want to achieve a few years down the road,
whether i'l be moving out of my parents place at all,
whether i'l have enough finances to sustain my individual lifestyle,
whether i'l love my job,
whether i'l find anyone right to spend my life with,
whether i'l stay strong in god, and strengthen my roots in church.

There's a lot of uncertainties just being confronted with these questions
So much so that I have avoided thinking about them for so long
But now i realise I have to be realistic
And start thinking hard ahead

I should be staying for my honours year,
though i am still considering whether to do a thesis
So that i could obtain a second upper.
There are sociology majors i know who have a higher cap score than me
Yet are filing for graduation
It makes me wonder where i get the confidence
to believe i can survive in an Hons class
Perhaps i want to hold on to that vision i believe i can attain,
I do not want to ever live with past regrets

I missed out the chance to go for an SEP,
simply cos i din't study hard enough for my first year
I haven't had the experience of living in a hostel either, even PGP,
Much less gone for an internship (which i have to come this summer break)
I figured i haven't really utilised much of what NUS has had to offer
And if only the clock could turn back its hands,
i would have lived my varsity days quite differently

And then there is the question of what career to venture into
Strange but for the first time i've seriously considered going into teaching
I teach at my friends tuition centre once a week now
And i've gotten really invaluable feedbacks from people
The kids love me, and i cannot get enuff of them too =)

Then again there is the option of going into the public sector
Or venturing into media, or aspects of businesses
Though i belive i have to face great competition vying for such jobs
And being the office slave could make me a bitch 5 yrs down the road

Decisions, decisions...
2007 is gonna be a tough year yet.